i was really damn freaking pissed off when i saw the announcement on wednesday. and as much as i was happy for him, there was a great sense of jealousy and anger.

i guess i really really needed that second bar for that sense of reassurance.

even if it's just for my last day, it would really really mean a lot to me.

to people in aslc and thinking about crossing over, PLEASE DO NOT DO IT. unless you're signing on or you really need the extra money. if you really want the army experience for your nsf career, please do not commit the same mistake as me.

okay dont think can make it in time for the singapore biathlon. nevermind, i shall start training for the 2011 one lol!

2009 is coming to an end.

well, it has been a fun year, getting posted to hq ncc. like wad mdm said, it's as if i was in another cca haha.

i dont think that i have accomplished much this year. it has been a long stay in hq ncc, but i dont think that i really did accomplish much there. it has been fun taking care of the kids at times, but i guess i'll be just one of those officers there that will be forgotten after a while.

on another note, commissioning early this year as a officer was definitely a milestone for me. i guess that it would be the only time that i did my family proud. all these years i've just been some useless crap that couldnt show any results. kept failing and failing in my studies to the point that i think my parents didnt really hope much from me in that area already. so i guess my silver bayonet and commissioning were the only things that could give a reason for my family to be proud of me. i really hoped that they were really proud of me. i really do.

2009 has been a year of reflection for me, maybe since i was thrown into the pond of reflection in camp TWICE already! throughout this year, there were many moments where i could actually evaluate myself. from leadership skills to interpersonal skills, i guess i've really learnt and improved a lot about myself this year. which is a good thing i guess, although it made me feel that i was really useless last time hahaha.

--

2010, i'll leave hq ncc, a place where many bonds were made. and then will come university, something that i've been sort of looking forward to. 2010 will definitely be a very new experience.

i'll also be further challenging myself my taking part in the biathlon. quite scared about that cause it has been a while since i swam haha. taking part in the adidas sundown marathon too! this time, i'll be aiming for <4.30 hrs!

all i wish for 2010 is for me to become a better and stronger person.

completed my first ever full marathon in less than 5 hours! damn happy about it! next up's the adidas sundown marathon! hopefully can complete below 4.30 hours!

and coc's completed! will kind of miss it haha! it's those kind of busy but fun courses that i shouldnt be experiencing for the rest of my term.

next up's the bintan trip with falcon! but i havent collected my passport hahaha!

tomorrow will be a new milestone for me! 42km here i come!

next week standard chartered marathon!

next next week end of coc!

and then it's the bintan trip with the falcons!!!

YES! LULL SOOOOOON!!!!

today, i was gay-ed.